Living from the Neck Up: Why Pleasure Requires Embodiment
In this mini-episode of the Connected Pleasure Podcast, I’m diving into what it means to live “from the neck up”—stuck in our heads, disconnected from our bodies, and unable to fully access pleasure.
So many of us have been conditioned to distrust our bodies, to push down emotions, and to operate only from the mind. But true pleasure, presence, and intimacy require embodiment. Together, we’ll explore:
- Why our culture keeps us in our heads and away from our bodies
- The impact of anxiety, negative beliefs, and shame on pleasure
- How somatic practices help you feel safe enough to be fully present
- Why one-on-one coaching is a powerful way to shift from overthinking into embodied living
If you’ve been longing to feel grounded in your body and reclaim pleasure as your birthright, this episode will give you insight into what’s possible.
👉 Ready to go deeper?
- Join my newsletter and receive your FREE Sacred Body Workbook: A Guide to Healing Body Image+ Embracing Pleasure
- Share or repost on Instagram (@connectedpleasurecoaching) to receive $100 off your coaching package AND tell a friend to give them $100 when they book a coaching package + ANOTHER $100 for you!! (Thats $200+ off depending on how many friends you refer who also book a coaching package!)
- Book your FREE 45-minute consultation to claim one of the six spots in my 1:1 container
Let’s move beyond living in our heads and come home to our bodies, together.
Transcript
Welcome back, my lovelies, to the Connect to Pleasure podcast. I'm Kaeli, your host. I use she her hers pronouns. And this is another episode in my mini series all about my one on one coaching container.
So this episode is going to be about living from the neck up, and that essentially means only really living inside of your brain. I've talked about this before, but in our society we have really divorced ourselves from our bodies.
Just like the episode I released yesterday, we are not really able to fully live in our bodies because of how society has created a sense of distrust with our bodies and feeling like our bodies are not enough. And so most of us live kind of from the neck up.
I know I did for a really long time and it wasn't until just a few years ago that I really started to notice that I needed to move further down into my body. But so did my clients. I really started to look more into somatic ways of doing therapy and doing healing work.
Because living in our brains just isn't enough. It doesn't fully integrate and help us live in this present moment.
And there are so many things that are stored in our bodies that our brains can't really have access to all the time. So many of the women that I have worked with struggle with living in their brains during a sexual experience.
If you have listened to any of the interviews that I've done so far on this podcast, you will know that I've been asking the question, what does pleasure mean to people? What is their definition of pleasure?
And everyone has said in one way or another that pleasure is really being in the present moment, being able to take in through all of our senses, the present moment. And pleasure is not something that is just in the brain, it is very much in the body as well.
And so when we get stuck in our brains just thinking about what's coming next, or having anxiety about what I'm doing, how I look, what I smell like, if I'm doing something right or wrong, if my partner is getting the pleasure that they want and need.
There's not a lot of focus on just the present moment and just being with the sensations that you're feeling in your body and trusting that your partner is there with you in that moment and that you get to co create that moment together. So part of what we do in my coaching container is addressing that.
It's addressing what are the thoughts, the belief systems, the negative thoughts, the anxieties that are running through your mind that are keeping you from being in that present moment. Is it? Maybe there's a fear of being actually in the present moment. And so maybe your mind is elsewhere.
Maybe you're thinking about all the things that you need to get done on that to do list. Maybe you're thinking about, you know, what you're gonna have for dinner.
Maybe you're thinking about, you know, a whole plethora of other things except for being in that specific moment. So there could be thoughts of anxiety, thoughts of negative belief systems, like around your body, around what that experience even means to you.
A lot of us have been steeped in a religious culture that told you that, you know, maybe sex is shameful.
And, you know, there are different aspects of that that could be impeding you from feeling like you can fully be in your body and in the moment with yourself and with your partner. So there's a whole bunch of different things of where your mind could go or different places where your mind could go.
But the main thing is that if we are constantly only living from the neck up and not getting down into our bodies, then pleasure is going to be a lot harder to access. So we are going to address those barriers that you have in your mind and work on some mindfulness practices.
Work on how do I have, again, a positive relationship with my body so that I can go into my body, I can feel safe in my body, and I can feel like I can move from just being in the head to also fully experiencing things in my body and knowing that that is safe and okay to do so. If that sounds like something that you're like, yes, I need that. I needed that like yesterday. Then please first go and join my newsletter.
I think that is the number one ask that I have for everyone. Please go join my newsletter. I put a lot of time and love and care into what I write in that newsletter.
Again, normally I only send them out twice a month on the new and full moon each month, I usually tell some type of personal story, tie it into some type of teaching around pleasure.
If I can tie some, like, music lyrics into it or something along the lines of music, I always love to do that because music is one of my other passions. As I've started this podcast, I've been updating my newsletter on the different podcast episodes that I'm releasing in between those newsletters.
And then I usually end it by giving you some good journal prompts for that specific new or full moon. I do follow astrology and I've learned to keep it brief.
So I give you just a little tidbit of what that new or full moon is and some really good journal prompts that will help you with the energy of that new and full moon as well. So that's the basics.
But with this launch, I will be switching from putting some of these videos on social media after this week to sharing most of the information through email. Next week is open cart week and so I will be sending out lots of emails and keeping you up to date on all the latest with that.
And if you are on my email list, you may get some discounts, there may be some, you know, open door discounts that happen and I don't know, we'll see where the week takes us next week. But you don't want to miss being able to get the first inside scoop of what's happening.
I will say with that too, I'm doing a soft affiliate program with colleagues, kind of a closed door program that I'm just inviting the people that I feel like are in my inner circle. But I want to open up a sort of affiliate program too. To anybody that is listening.
I would love if you go onto my Instagram, which is Connected Pleasure Coaching, yes, at Connected Pleasure Coaching on Instagram.
If you repost one of my posts that I've done the last couple weeks, I have lots of reels now that I've been posting last week and this week about this one on one coaching container that I'm launching. If you go in there and repost something, tag me in it. I will give you $100 off.
If you end up, you know, booking a 45 minute free consultation with me and moving through into the process of booking a coaching container or coaching package, I will give you a hundred dollars off with that. If you refer this to someone else. If you say, hey, go listen to this podcast, I think it would be great. And that person says, hey, hey.
This person referred me that they listened to your podcast. They told me that I should go listen to your podcast.
And then they also schedule and book a coaching package with me, they will also get a hundred dollars off. So if you go repost something on my Instagram to your social media and tag me, you get a hundred dollars off. If you book a coaching package.
If you refer to somebody else, they get a hundred dollars off. And you get a hundred dollars off if you refer them.
So you could potentially get $200 off for sharing it with somebody or just sharing it on your social media and then sharing it with somebody, you could get $200 off. And whoever you share it with, they will also get $100 off. So I am oh, open and Willing to anyone sharing this.
And you know, this is in the spirit of community. This is in the spirit of allowing our networks to work as like a mycelial network in the ground.
We all know someone, we all can link arms and help each other. And I know that there are six people out in the world that this one on one container is exactly what they need.
So I am inviting you or enlisting all of you to help me find those people.
Okay, the second thing that I want you to do, if this again is something that is really speaking to you and you're like, yes, I need this container, go book a 45 minute consultation with me. I have a good amount of spots available next week and that is going to be your footstep toward moving and actually booking a package.
I think I really would like to touch one on one with everyone that schedules a package just so that they feel comfortable that this is the right fit for them. And I also feel like you are the right fit for this package.
So I really would like anyone that wants to actually move towards booking a coaching package with me to first schedule your free 45 minute consultation so that we can have some one on one time to talk with each other and make sure that this is the right fit for both of us, that one of these six spots is in fact yours, that you get to stake your claim and then we will get you booked for that coaching package. Okay? So to recap, join my newsletter. You get your, I forgot to mention, you get your free Sacred Body workbook with the signup.
Again, signup is completely without obligation. You can unsubscribe at any time. But go do that for any updates and surprise discounts that you may get next week.
Then go tag me in a repost somewhere on Instagram or social media. Get a hundred dollars off. Get another. Get another a hundred dollars off.
If you refer this program to someone else, they also book and then they get a hundred dollars off.
So just go spread the word and then if you are really wanting to like move forward and schedule a or book a coaching package with me, go schedule your free 45 minute consultation for next week. Okay, I love you all and I will talk to you again tomorrow. Take care.